Secret AGENT Man

Have you ever played Secret Agent Men? Well, you should. It's only the funnest game of all time!!!! I played it at school today with a few friends and totally freaked our subject out! ha! ok so heres what you do. Pick a subject. any random person walking the streets/halls. then follow them. watch them. but dont be seen. slide along walls, peek around corners, hide if they turn around. Follow them everywhere. It sounds creepy i know but it's so fun. I can't wait to play it at college. I hope people arent too grown up to play with me though. Why do we have to grow up anyway? Lifes only fun if yer crazy!! so play with me!!

I'm getting better. It's getting easier. U don't need to worry. :)

STUPID

stupid! you're so stupid! how could u do that!? why didnt you just...

i may have ruined everything. i feel so bad. i think im gonna barf. or cry. which ever comes first. maybe both. forgive me. i'm just stupid.

We have something in common, sky. I'm blue too.

The sky is so blue today, the clouds so white. The sky is my favorite part about this planet. I love its wrath, its beauty. And today its beauty was trying to persuade me to be happy, but I think I've forgotten how. Yes, I smile, I have moments of joy, but my eyes water when I yawn and sometimes it is my excuse.

My dad asked me about my senior trip, a trip which, traditionally, is some sort of road trip taken with a group of friends after graduation. I have a car. I have a road. I have numerous destinations I would love to go to. I'm just missing friends. When he asked, I couldn't think of anyone to go with, at least not anyone who possibly could. I have close aquaintances or casual friends but no one close enough, in distance or relationship, to accompany me on a senior trip. We aren't as close as we once were and I couldn't imagine going anywhere with them. My older brother couldn't either. The only person he was close enough to was a girl and great lengths were taken to keep a sort of chaperone but they were able to go together. I don't think that could happen for me though. It...it just wouldn't work out. So I guess I'm staying home.

Car Warz

guess what! i dont know what to do. never mind. i think i pretty much bombed my ap stats test. had a mini panic attack and almost didnt finish. but i did. thats lame. i dont think i learned any of that stuff. LAME! school is getting a little easier actually. mostly because im...cough...trying.

okay i had a car war! this dude behind me was throwing stuff at my car while i was leaving the high school parking lot. (i knew him) the kids i was taking home were yelling at him. they tried to throw a lint roller back but completely missed. HA! lame. i drove away speedin a bit. they followed. on a 45 mph speed limit road, they tried to pass me. i went 60 to not let them but they still did so im guessing they were going like 70!! at the stop sign the kids in my car got out and threw trash in their window. one got in their car! haha! (remember we knew them) we preceeded to drive recklessly and yell at each other. the kid throwing stuff at my car then threw every piece of garbage out the window on the highway! i was ticked! litterbugs! i hate them! just give the trash back!! geesh!!!

DANGER! DANGER!

i said too much. close call? or did it hit the target.

Journal?

Lately I havent been doing to well on writing in my journal. i once did it for years, every day. Which i think is exactly the reason why i cant keep it up. now i hate it. despise it!! but maybe i can use this as my journal. id have to make it more...closed to the public, more private, but whatever. i ask CHACHA questions about my problems. i don't often like the answers i'm givin. such as "Dont go chasing waterfalls" and "No there is no cure for senioritis". well thanks for nothing cha cha. senior skip days are over and im going back to school tomorrow. i havent been to school on an A day since monday. last monday. man am i in for a homework load! i already brought all of my stuff from b day home! couldnt even fit it all in my backpack. funny how the time when i care least about homework and grades, i get the most and it counts the most. Stupid school system. who came up with this crap? im going to bed. and i dont want to wake up until July. stupid internal clock. i hate your face and your hands. ...mleh!
k

Bored out of my mind and falling slowly

hello. im bored out of my mind and fAlling slowly. i dont care anyMore. I dont care about school. I doNt care about my future. i dont care about anything except...weLl i cant tell you that. just knOw that it pretty much runs my life and it has for years. i dont know what to do about it. i cant get rid of it. tried many times. i cant stop it from growing. it grows anyway. and now it's starting to hurt and i just want it to go away. but at the same time i dont. its so close, so close to being done, oVer, finished, and maybe something grEat. but right now it's not and i'm impatient. i can't take it anymore. i'm falling slowly.